Bunk's Pre-2nd Birthday Photo Bash
In two short weeks, The Bunk will turn two years old. In the "dog years" formulation, he'd be starting high school, battling acne, and starting to dream of getting his learner's permit. But, unlike most teenagers, The Bunk just gets sweeter and sweeter, showing none of the mumbling aloofness of the typical freshman.
So: Happy Birthday, Bunk. Here are some pictures to brighten your day, as he does ours.
The Bunk gazes longingly into the backyard. Perhaps he is thinking about barking at the family of chipmunks that has emerged from its home under our neighbor's shed. Perhaps he has discovered the meaning of life, but is keeping it to himself.
The Bunk sleeping in the "splayed" position, which he only wangles himself into when he's feeling utterly secure and content. Sweet dreams, my boy.
The Bunk, pensive. Or, sleepy.
The Bunk after a brush, so his fur is at maximum poof. Isn't he just the cutest dog in the whole, wide world? Of course he is. It was a rhetorical question.
The Bunk vs. Homer Simpson. This is a doll--stuffed body, plasticene head--that was given to Bunk by Monsoon's parents on a recent visit to Norristown. Note the ferocious and merciless tactics of The Bunk in attacking Homer. Soon he will go into his "death roll," in which he grasps the unlucky Simpson in his paws and shimmies around on his back while gnawing on Homer and growling menacingly. I can't resist: D'oh!Monsoon
The Bunk Days of Summer
Hey friends,
Thought I'd give you all an update on the sweetest dog in the world.
That would be Bunk, for those new to the weblog.
He just turned 22 months old and continues to love life - and we continue to love life with him.
The boy was groomed today and it occurred to me that I haven't shared pictures of him in quite a while. So here are some pictures.
Enjoy!
The Slumbering Bunk. After a long day at the office (aka the Bark N Barn, his utopian daycare retreat), The Bunk likes to curl up with a pillow and get some richly deserved shuteye.
The Slumbering Bunk, worm's eye view. Those great paws led us to think he might grow quite large, but The Bunk is actually small for the breed.
The Bunk out the window, taking in all the sights, the sounds, the smells - and probably a bug or two - as the wind blows through his mane, while (I am) driving through Lancaster County. Note: this photo was taken in exactly the way you think it was taken, which was not smart. I promise I will not repeat this action.
The Bunk, captured here in early June after a brushing, looks down imposingly from the stairs. Yes, imposing. Seriously! He will mess you up! Have you seen his teeth? Oh, alright.
The Bunk asleep on Monsoon. If I look really happy here, it's because I am.
The Bunk, newly groomed, sits pretty earlier today. This act of obedience earned him a "Gooood siiiiiit!" and a treat. Alright, two treats. This is one of those moments when Mrs. Monsoon and I look at each other and say something like, "He is so cute, he doesn't even look real." And you know what? It's damned right.Monsoon
The Vicissitudes of Spring ... The Majesty of Bunk
Stay tuned after the weather update for brand-new Bunk content!
The weather...
Weather narrative: We’re going to see the fickle vicissitudes of early spring over the next couple of weeks. After today (Sunday) we can bid a fond adieu to the 70-plus temperatures and “spring fever” of the past few days. Monday will bring in a cold front, and with it some rain and plummeting temperatures. Look for the bulk of the rain late Monday afternoon and evening, perhaps lingering into Tuesday morning.
On Wednesday it gets back up into the low 60s, but a stiff wind will make it feel more like autumn than spring. On Friday we get cooler again with showers possible on that day and on Sunday.
Next week (the last week of March) is looking rather cold and rainy, with the possibility of frozen precipitation early on Sunday the 28th and Monday the 29th. This will just be a little dusting or coating – a reminder of what we’re leaving behind, and what we won’t see around these parts again until year’s end.
Beyond the forecast: As we get into what is, for many of us, an abbreviated Spring Break, I’m seeing temperatures rebound into the low to mid 50s (closer to normal for this time of year) with drier conditions generally.
And now, as promised: The Bunk.
I’ve been remiss in providing you updates and pictures of The Bunk here in the New Year; I was a bit preoccupied with the snow, the snow, the snow.
The Bunk is 19 months old now (or he will be, on Wednesday), and remains, believe me, and absolute gentleman. Indeed, to speak feelingly of him, he is the very card or calendar of gentry. [Someone help me: we finished Hamlet a month ago, and yet I cannot stop quoting it. It is not, nor it cannot come to good. See?]
Anywho, he’s a delight. Yesterday he seemed to have finally understood the concept of “fetch” while we mucked about on the tennis courts, but only fleetingly: when he became more interested in a far-off sound, an intriguing smell, or a passing dog, the game was over. He has a formidable bark whose depth and apparent ferocity belie the mildness and poofery of his appearance.
Here are some snapshots of The Bunk being The Bunk, in his own inimitable way.
The Bunk maintains his dignity despite being clad in Christmas-themed garb - Boxing Day 2009 
Lounging happily betwixt two pieces of furniture, his body on the chair and his head on the hassock, The Bunk takes both malleability and adorability to new heights - January 2010 
DFW: Down for Whatever - January 2010 
The Bunk, plastered to my side, some idyllic weekend - February 2010 
The Bunk breaks his own previous record for malleability, wedged into the chair in the sunbeam, fast asleep - February 2010 
Fully splayed, looking like an albino Grover - February 2010 
Who's a sleepy boy? You are! You are! - March 2010 
The Bunk, at play, yesterday - March 2010
Happy New Year 2010 - Forecast and Bunk greeting
My good people,
After the forecast, I’ve included New Year’s tidings from The Bunk, who wanted to be sure to thank his fans for their love and adoration over this past year or so. (His muzzle is shorn in a poodlishly arresting way to address some matting in the area. But we already know that, whatever the state of his coiffure— puff-out, buzz-cut, mop-top, cornrows, or high-top fade—he is, now and forever, The Bunk. And thanks to Jon and Lori at Total Dog for taking such good care of his coat, even when we don’t.)
Thu 12/31 - after this morning’s snow showers, which gave us two or three inches (and about which I intended to send a forecast update yesterday, but forgot—honest!), we’ll have snow and flurries developing in the evening and continuing overnight, accumulating an additional inch or two. Please be careful driving, as conditions may deteriorate right around when revelry may be at its peak. Low tonight 29.
Fri 1/1 - overcast with widely scattered morning snow showers. Temperatures becoming colder throughout the day with gusty winds, but the precipitation and winds should not cause travel difficulties. High 38, low 25.
Sat 1/2 - partly to mostly cloudy with a slight chance of passing flurries or snow showers throughout the day. Very windy for the duration of the day. High 30, low 17 with single-digit wind chills.
Sun 1/3 - partly cloudy, still quite windy, and even colder. High 28, low 14 with wind chills dipping down toward zero.
The week back to school - highs in the low to mid 30s; lows in the upper teens. Other than a chance of a passing snow shower or two on Monday 1/4, not much this week in the way of winter precipitation.
Next chances for winter weather - things are looking interesting for 1/11 and 1/12, and again on the 14th and 15th. Generally the pattern is setting up nicely for some winter weather in mid-January. Stay tuned!
"We'll take a cup of kindness yet, / for auld lang syne." Happy New Year, y'all!
O Bunk-a-doo, O Bunk-a-doo...
...thy patience is unending.
In honor of the 16-month anniversary of The Bunk's birth (and the eve of Christmas Day), we decided to create some memorable photos involving the dog, a Santa outfit, and a reindeer headband. In the course of this photo shoot there was much laughter, commotion, confusion, repeated commands, frantic hand gestures, and biting of the wardrobe items. But finally we came up with a couple of really sweet shots of long-suffering Bunk in his holiday finery. Also included is a shot of The Bunk frolicking in the snow following last weekend's Nor'easter. Please to enjoy.
Before I present the photos, though, I need to send a special yuletide shout-out to those of you who came through in fine style in response to my "wallet calendar" plea a few posts back: Sue, Brent, and especially Phyllis--who not only printed a page of the cards, but also endured the disapproving glares of some Hallmark store workers as she nabbed several of the coveted giveaways. My dad will be thrilled with the bevy of ways in which he'll be able to tell what day it is.
Snow-loving Bunk gambols happily round the Grove 
Santa Bunk, up close and delightful 
The Bunk, clad in festive garb, sits for a portraitHave a happy, safe, and healthy holiday!
Monsoon's One-Year Bunkiversary Extravaganza!
Woof.
It is time once again to celebrate the life and times of The Bunk, who just turned 15 months old. This time last year (Thanksgiving break) was when that magnificent little fuzzball came into our lives.
Over the past few months, The Bunk has acquired a cousin—a Bichon Frise puppy named Buttons, who was welcomed into the Spatz family. Buttons is a wily, diminutive bundle of naughtiness, and the two of them have taken quite well to hanging out together some days. The picture below is a fine illustration of the horseplay in which Bunk and Buttons typically indulge.
The Bunk and Buttons - so named because of his cute little button eyes - have a snarling, furry romp in the kitchen
The Bunk also endured another health issue (though he’s completely fine now): he had a strange growth between two of his “toes,” and it turned out that it was a benign tumor caused by a viral infection. The upshot is that he had to have the thing removed, so about two weeks of pain pills and antibiotics and a wrapped paw followed that. We did use the “cone” for a few days, but he found a way to winkle out of it in his crate anyway, so we just abandoned it. Besides, he left the dressing alone and was, over all, a champ about the whole process.
The Bunk, heavily medicated, rests in his favorite spot; note the bandage on the left front paw
Since he was drugged up and just wanted to be left alone to sleep, Mrs. Monsoon and I neglected to brush him consistently. As a result, by the middle of this month, The Bunk’s coat was a frowzy mass of tangles and mats. And so, the good people at Total Dog and a Little Cat had to shear our boy dramatically when he returned to their fold for some grooming.
The Bunk, shorn, relaxes with loved ones on Thanksgiving Day
We did have The Bunk in a Halloween costume, but he was clad in it so fleetingly that no in-focus photographic evidence exists of this event. We managed to cram a bat-themed headband on him and he sat still long enough for us to snap a picture. Soon thereafter, he cuffed the offending headgear off and began to attack it.
The Bunk wears bat headband, fleetingly
For the upcoming holiday, I make this promise: I will clothe The Bunk in festive garb, take a picture of the result, and post it here on the weblog. Speaking of the holidays, here is a shot of The Bunk attacking a little stuffed reindeer toy I could not resist purchasing today at Petsmart.
The Bunk vs. stuffed reindeer toy; Monsoon's prediction: reindeer will be headless by December
The Bunk continues to amaze us each and every day with his steadfastness, his devotion, his sweetness. He follows us around, from floor to floor and room to room, simply because he needs to be near us—not in an annoying way, but it a faithful way. Marika noted on Thanksgiving Day that The Bunk is "a leaner." That is, when he wants to show affection or wishes to be petted, he leans into this person in the most snuggly (yet insistent) way. When one of us comes home—or kith and kin come for a visit—he can’t help jumping up to signal his joy. We’re still trying to curtail this behavior, but haven’t yet had much success.
I’ll wrap up here with a few more pictures of The Bunk for your delight. Enjoy the rest of your holiday break!
The Bunk sits adorably by the window. Face it: he's the most beautiful dog in the whole world. Seriously. Get over it. 
The Bunk takes a well-earned break from roughhousing with Buttons
The Bunk Turns One!
Yes, my friends: The Bunk has now completed the first year of his life, and is charging in a glorious, 44-pound blur of hair and teeth into his second.
If our first nine months with The Bunk have taught us anything, it's that the standard poodle may just be the crème de la crème of the canine world. He is even-tempered (ask his cousin Emily how tolerant and patient he is when being ordered and tugged around by a kindergartener), obedient (usually, when it comes to "sit" and "down" and "leave it," but we're still working on "no bark" and some other things), does not beg for table scraps, does not shed, and is the lovingest, cuddliest dog in history. (These are objective observations, by the way.)
A few days ago I found a book called Pet Poodle from the 1950s while poking around at the Clay Book Store. In it, Arlene Erlanger writes with unabashed sentiment and charming effusion about the poodle, a breed she calls, with typical hyperbole, "all dogs to all men." One passage in particular reminded me of The Bunk, and what we have come to love so dearly about him: "Food and exercise are not as vital to his well-being as human companionship: he can get along under almost any conditions; he can do without regular meals; he can do without adequate exercise, but he cannot live without love." (She also writes, when discussing a male poodle's elimination habits, "Sometimes lifting the leg is merely a form of courtesy in a dog, corresponding to the gesture of a gentleman's lifting his hat." Now, I know it's been rather a long while since gentlemen wore hats and regularly tipped them at folks they passed in the street, but I don't think The Bunk means a friendly greeting when he lifts his leg on a tree...)
The Bunk was born August 24, 2008 in Reamstown. (Can it have been a year already? "Sunrise, sunset / Swiftly flow the days...") The earliest known pictures we have of him are at nine weeks, when he was still named Mercedez (which sounds like the name of some spoilt, odious little prat that would be featured on a show like MTV's "My Super Sweet Sixteen"). He came into our lives around Thanksgiving (at 3 months) and, well, he's perfect. In fact, sometimes we'll be watching him play, or sleep, or we'll be petting him or brushing him, and we'll literally look at each other and say, "He is the perfect dog." And it's damn right.
The Bunk at nine weeks old, less than a month before we got him.
The Bunk, Christmas 2008, aged four months.
The Bunk chills by the window a couple of weeks ago; note that his right ear is blowing in the breeze created by the air vent on top of which he has positioned himself. 
The Bunk, recently trimmed by his friends at the Total Dog, relaxes in the chair on a lazy Sunday (just yesterday, in fact), and looks out the front window at some perceived interloper; soon, there will be barking.
The Bunk poses on his birthday specially for you, his adoring fans.
One Small Step for Bunk, One Giant Leap for Canis Familiaris
In honor of the 40th anniversary of the Apollo Moon Landing hoax, I thought I'd give you all an update on The Bunk. (There is no connection aside from the post's title; just go with it.) It’s been more than two months since I last posted an entry about The Bunk, our charming fluffball of a standard poodle—and that entry detailed my dismay at the radical shearing our boy underwent back in May to remedy the “mats” in his fur.
But contrary to my worst fears, Bunk’s powers of sweetness and devotion were not contained, Samson-like, in his hair; he’s been the lovingest, cuddlingest little four-legged companion a guy could ask for. And his hair is growing back in, so he’s got far more “poof” going on.
As the months go by—we’ve had Bunk now for eight months, and this coming Friday is his 11-month birthday—more and more of his enchanting personality emerges. When one of us opens the door to the pantry, for instance, he will daintily take a treat out of the bag on the floor and carry it out to the living room, where he happily (but systematically) devours it. He never takes more than one at a time—though he’s been known to return for seconds when the pantry door is left ajar.
Bunk’s new favorite spot to lounge is in the chair by the window whose color has been the subject of ongoing and vociferous disagreements in the Monsoon household. (Mrs. Monsoon insists it’s green; I say it’s tan. What say you, dear reader? See pictures below.)
Though he has his moments of vigor and verve, and he surely enjoys a bit of roughhousing or a long walk through town, Bunk seems to love nothing more than to join one of us in a nap, or to fall asleep at our side while being petted. We’re still trying to work on “down” (as in, “Bunk, please don’t signal your enthusiasm for our guest by engaging her in an involuntary chest-bump”), and the oddest things set him off to barking (“No bark!” doesn’t seem to have any effect on him; nor do “Bunk, Jesus!” or “Give it a rest!”).
Back on Memorial Day weekend, Bunk had his first exposure to fireworks during the Adamstown Community Days celebration. In short, he hates them. He spent the whole time cowering and trembling next to Mrs. Monsoon, and he still gets spooked when he hears thunder or gunfire; the Adamstown Rod & Gun Club is across the valley, so when they’re open, Bunk is pressed up against me, tail tucked between his legs. (I thought about taking this opportunity to insult the folks who patronize the above-mentioned gun range, but then I remember that they have guns, and I don’t.)
Here are the pictures...
The Bunk lies surrounded by his toys, as is his wont; here he has actually fallen asleep while chewing on his bone 
The Bunk in the chair by the window with head propped adorably on armrest 
The Bunk's favored deep-sleeping position: on his back with top half of his body torqued 90 degrees--and of course, toys arrayed about him 
The Bunk at the ready, eager as always to please
The Bunk, Shorn. Bandana = Insult to Injury.
Jon, from The Total Dog and a Little Cat, called at 3pm. They had tried to save Bunk’s lush, shaggy coat—his trademark, the feature that puts the unk in Bunk—but the mats were too inscrutable, the tangles too numerous. Despite our religious brushing regimen, which has been chronicled here, Bunk’s hair was determined to kink, knot and snarl itself into jungly oblivion. And so, though he’d only been scheduled for a sorely-needed bath and a bit of maintenance grooming while at doggy day care, Bunk needed to be closely cropped. I was to pick him up in the evening.
And I did.
It’s not that Jon bungled the cut; on the contrary, he does lovely work. It’s just that when Bunk came out from behind the counter, he looked as though he’d been through some sort of cartoon wringer where Tom comes out stick-thin (but perfectly unharmed) on the other side. He nearly knocked me over with his customary jubilant leap of greeting, so I knew it was him, but I couldn’t shake the sense that someone had stolen half of my dog.
All I could do was gape, and chuckle in disbelief, and shake my head. Actually, I shouldn’t use past tense there; still gawping, still chortling, still waving the noggin to and fro with incredulity from time to time. He’s spindly now, and he almost looks like a...
a...
a poodle. (shudder)
Until his luscious locks grow back—and I’ve been assured, they will grow back, to our desired length—no one will mistake him for goldendoodle or a labradoodle or any other kind of doodle. (He’s still our Bunk-a-doodle, though. Always our boy.)
But truly there are no words for the change that has occurred in Bunk’s appearance. Only photographic evidence can really do it justice. And so...
The Bunk in All His Hirsute, Unshorn Glory, Near End of April
The Bunk, on Same Couch, Pruned Clean of Six Yaks' Worth of Hair
The Bunk, Shorn. Bandana = Insult to Injury
The Bunk, Mown to the Nubs Like a Midsummer Lawn; Furry Arms Do Remind Me of Grover, So There's That
Bunk's powers were in his flowing locks, like Samson, or Fabio. Now he's just an ordinary dog. But when his hair grows back, the majesty of The Bunk will rise again...
Monsoon's How Hot Will It Get / Bunk-a-bration
How hot will it get? No, that’s not the title of the newest jam by Thugg Mugg featuring Flexx Nutz and Neecie Flambé. It’s a reference to the near-record temperatures, 20 degrees or more above the seasonal average high (the low to mid 60s), that await us this weekend.
But first, allow me to celebrate: Friday is the eight-month anniversary of The Bunk’s birth, and he’s still a delight. He is fully healed from his surgery and seems to be coping well with his no-nad-hood.
Some personality (caninality? clumsy as that sounds, I think it’s actually a word) quirks continue to emerge: he is an inveterate finger- and toe-licker, for reasons that even he would be at a loss to explain; he prefers to sleep whilst jammed up against a door, preferably lying on his back with his extremities in the air; one of his favorite pastimes is to splash around with his paws in a shallow receptacle—like a water bowl, for example; he has a weakness for toilet paper sur la rouleau (on the roll); he likes being brushed, but things take a sour turn when someone tries to brush, however delicately, in the area of his nethers—then he emits a reedy lamentation (which is unfailingly hilarious) and tries to bite the brush, and the brusher. In short, we love him.
So here are some recent pictures of The Bunk for your enjoyment.
The Bunk on The Couch 
The Bunk Examines Backyard; Gets Scritch from Monsoon 
The Bunk Slumbers in Splayed Contentment
Now, on to the weather. Let’s look first at the next five days or so...
Friday 4/24: Mostly sunny and warmer with mild southwest breezes. High 77, low 49.
Saturday 4/25: Plenty of sunshine, breezy and still warmer. The temperature should easily eclipse the record of 84, set in 2001. High 87, low 56.
Sunday 4/26: Sunny, clear and very warm. The temperature could challenge the record of 91 set in 1990. High 90, low 58.
Monday 4/27: Partly cloudy and continued very warm. We could again challenge a record: 92, set almost a century ago in 1915. High 89, low 56.
Tuesday 4/28: Partly cloudy and still warm, but not quite as balmy; increasing clouds and humidity. High 82, low 56.
The second half of next week is looking grey and wet (no, that’s not Rue McClanahan’s memoir of struggling to maintain her libido into her 70s, it’s just a description of the weather) with highs in the upper 60s, lows in the upper 40s, and rain possible on Wednesday and Thursday.
Next weekend, as we limp into May, we’re looking at conditions a bit below normal with highs in the 50s on Saturday 5/2 and the mid to upper 60s on Sunday 5/3, with cloud cover and rain possible on Sunday.
The first full week of May (Monday the 4th through Friday the 8th) is looking seasonably pleasant and right about average, with highs in the low 70s and lows in the upper 40s to low 50s. The next really good chance of rain comes in around that next weekend, the 9th and 10th.
Monsoon's Weather / Bunk Update for Sunday, 5 April 2009
I’m well overdue for a weather update, so here goes: we’re going to be fluctuating wildly through the coming weeks—60s one day, 40s the next; rain one day, brilliant sunshine the next—so be sure to dress and prepare accordingly. Just a little weather tip from your old pal Monsoon.
[A quick update on The Bunk, who had surgery to remove his testicles on Monday 3/30: he’s recuperating like a champ. He’s all hirsute energy, and was thrilled to have been freed from his “cone” (the Elizabethan collar) a couple of days ago—though he still wears it at night. Wound is healing nicely, all is well, and he’ll be visiting his friends at the Total Dog on Tuesday! Pretty soon I’ll let him address you all again, as he so memorably (and profanely) did the day of his surgery. A couple of snapshots appear after the forecast.]
Sunday 4/5 – sunny and very mild with a high in the mid to upper 60s. Clouding up in the evening ahead of an approaching cold front. Look for rain developing toward dawn on Monday. Low 48.
Monday 4/6 – overcast and rather windy with rain—heavy at times—and a thunderstorm likely. Watch for hail and damaging winds with the storm, though I don’t think we’re going to approach the widespread damage seen last weekend. Rain becoming intermittent in the evening, tapering to showers and drizzle late. High 59, low 43.
Tuesday 4/7 – mostly cloudy; clearing throughout the day. A shower cannot be ruled out early. Quite windy and markedly colder. High 46, low 29.
Wednesday 4/8 – partly cloudy, breezy and chilly. High 47, low 33.
Thursday 4/9 – partly cloudy with clouds rolling in late; rain possible in the evening and overnight. Milder. High 54, low 38.
Friday 4/10 – rather cloudy and breezy with showers and drizzle possible on and off throughout the day. High 52, low 45.
Next weekend is looking clear and seasonably mild for the holiday celebrations, egg hunts, and the like: clear to partly cloudy and breezy with highs in the mid to upper 50s and lows around 40.
Next week is looking rainy and cool—at least to start. Rain is possible anytime Monday through Wednesday, with highs only in the low to mid 50s. By Thursday and Friday we’re looking at clearing skies and somewhat milder conditions with temperatures getting into the upper 50s and low 60s.
Beyond we’re looking a bit rainy (April showers, and all that) and cool, followed by the warmest temperatures of the season so far around the 20th or 21st—highs perhaps reaching into the 70s!
The Bunk Pauses in Chewing Toy to Pant, Gaze Out Window. 
The Bunk Gazes Sweetly at Monsoon. On Far Left of Picture Lies Remnants of Ropy Triceratops Toy, Mercilessly Pulverized By Sweet Bunk.
"Where My Ding-Dangs At?" - The Bunk
In honor of his successful surgery today, I thought I’d let Bunk write this post reflecting on his experiences. Enjoy!
Hey, everybody! Has anyone seen my nuts?
But I kid. How they hangin'? Just a little joke among us castrati.
Earlier today I was neutered. I was asleep for it, but I’m not going to lie: I’ve got some lingering groin tenderness.
I know all about why it’s good and right for me to have undergone this surgery. I’ll live longer, I’ll stop pissing on the vacuum cleaner at the doggy day care, and I can stop all the damned humping already. (Not that I was known for it or anything—my owners nipped that in the bud the first time I got a little too friendly with a leg—but every now and again, when the testosterone started flowing...well, a dog’s gotta do what a dog’s gotta do.)
I spent the first hour or two after my owners brought me home in utter misery. As if the whole castration thing weren't indignity enough, I’ve got this goddamned Elizabethan collar on my head to stop me from biting the wound. I’m trying to walk around the house, and I don’t have peripheral vision worth a good god damn, so I keep running into shit. Mr. and Mrs. Monsoon keep stifling laughs when that happens, like it’s adorable and pathetic all at once. Maybe I’ll bite one of them on the ankle, and then when they hop around bleeding and screaming, I’ll snicker about how adorable and pathetic they look. Hey—a dog can dream...
After laying and whining for a bit, then trying futilely to rid myself of this infernal collar, I had a bit of a nosh and then conked out in front of the door. I’m supposed to wear this thing 24/7 for ten days, and I can’t run and jump for a week and a half either (no worries there—I don’t think Monsoon would be elevating for any dunks after having his tatties lopped off, you know what I’m saying?).
Below are a few pictures, some of which will enable you to enjoy a titter at my expense. Go on. Laugh it up, Chuckles. I may be a fuzzy ball of unimaginable cuteness, but I'll ... well, suffice it to say I’ve met some pretty unsavory bitches at doggy day care.
The BUNK
I gaze out the window in simpler times, just days before the surgery: pre-collar, pre-"fixing." 
It just ain't right.
Trying to get a bite to eat. 
Pondering the indignity of it all.
Monsoon Celebrates The Bunk
Friends,
The Bunk turned seven months old on Tuesday! He's now approximately 40 pounds and just as fluffy and adorable. In fact, several times a day, Mrs. Monsoon says, "Oh my God, do we not have the cutest dog in the whole wide world?" (And that's not just the pain pills talking.)
It's a rhetorical question, of course: we do, in fact, have the cutest dog in the whole wide world.
Next week, The Bunk will be facing the first surgery of his young life; he will undergo an orchidectomy. (No, this procedure does not involve an orchid, as pleasant as this sounds. The etymology of "orchidectomy" is Greek: "orchis" means "testis" and "ectomy" means removal. In other words, he's having his bollocks evacuated. His knapsack emptied. He will be nadless.)
All that aside, here are some great recent shots of The Bunk!
The Bunk Takes Break from Squeaky Lizard Conquest. 
The Bunk Keeps Watch on Backyard from Favorite Spot. 
The Bunk, in Full Just-Groomed Poof, Claims The Monsoon
The BUNK Frolics in the Snow
Friends,
A dispatch from Monday's snowstorm - The Bunk enjoyed the snow quite a bit, as is evidenced by the two pictures below. He was soaking wet when we brought him in--especially his "undercarriage"...
I have also included a brief video of The Bunk scrambling around the back yard in the snow on 3/2.
The BUNK - Snow Frolic on 3/2/09 from Glen Martin on Vimeo.
Enjoy!
Monsoon's Weather Forecast / Bunk Birthday Bash
Tuesday, February 24th is the 6-month anniversary of The Bunk’s birth, and he is still (at about 35 pounds now) just as wonderful as the day we got him in November. He’s been a little finicky with his food, and a couple of incidents have driven (rather graphically) home just how sensitive his stomach can be. But I think we’ve got a good handle on his intake now, and of course the folks at Total Dog continue to take great care of him.
Here are a couple of recent photos. In the first, The Bunk merrily chews his rubber chicken chew toy. The second is a bird's-eye view of The Bunk with the evidence of his lavatory marauding. (The Bunk has an insatiable appetite for facial tissues—preferably used—as well as toilet paper, paper towels, and the like. In fact, Sasha and Ruthie had that same proclivity. Does anyone know why dogs go gaga for these sorts of things? I mean, I get that it’s fun to tear it up, but beyond that, is there a reason? Are cats like this, too? I am fascinated.) And the third shot is of The Bunk napping sweetly on the big pillow.
Happy Birthday, big man!
The Bunk Gnaws Chicken, On the Alert.
Exhibit A: The Bunk Caught in Brazen T.P. Raid. 
The Bunk Bunks Out Blissfully on the Big Pillow.
So, the weather...as I said in my last communication, I’m thinking we are approaching spring rapidly. Notwithstanding Tuesday night’s frigid temperatures, there’s little evidence that we’ll have to deal with “wintry” weather (precipitation or chills) for much longer. Check it out...
The weather:
Weather narrative: For the remainder of the week, we’ll see far milder temperatures. Some rain is possible on Thursday into Friday, after which things will cool off somewhat again for the weekend.
Next week will start out seasonably cool, but temperatures will once again rise into the 50s by week’s end. Rain is possible on Tuesday and Wednesday, and into Thursday morning. If a cold front coincides with some weekend precipitation, we may see some sleet on or around the 7th, but then things moderate again.
Beyond the forecast: Warming up as we approach mid-March.
We Want the Bunk! Gotta Have that Bunk! (ow)
Habari mori,
The purpose of this post is twofold: to update you regarding my thinking about the potential storm next week, and to update you about the growth of The Bunk. Starting, then, with the most important news of
the two...
Bunk just turned five months old on January 24th and is filling out nicely. He’s every bit the delight he was when he first came into our lives two months ago, and his training continues to go swimmingly. (He’s mastered “sit” and “down” and is working on “stay,” “come,” and “leave it.”)
I thought I’d share some new pictures of Bunk, who now weighs 32 pounds—he was around 22 when we got him—and will apparently not stop growing until sometime this summer! In the first picture, Bunk is happily stretched out on the rug in our bathroom; in the second—an action shot—Bunk is furiously trying to bite the hot air that is being blasted from the hair dryer by his cruel daddy. And the final picture is a close-up of Bunk’s sweet face as he sleeps serenely at the end of the couch.
The Bunk at 5 months
The Bunk vs. Hair Dryer
The Bunk at Rest
An update about the Nor’easter that could affect our weather on Monday and Tuesday: the models continue to be out of agreement, but trends suggest this is going to be a bust. We’re still nearly 48 hours from the event (or at least the part of the event that could be interesting), so a lot can happen between now and then, but here’s what I’m thinking as of now...
Monday will bring rain showers by late afternoon continuing into the overnight hours, with a few snowflakes mixing in. Maybe as much as a coating to a half-inch by Tuesday morning, but nothing to worry about. High 41, low 33.
Tuesday will see some snow showers and increasing wind, but since the low looks to be positioning itself off the coast, the storm will track to the east of what was originally thought, the amount of moisture will be less, the foot-plus snow dump will be averted. High 34 low 18.
Wednesday will see some lingering flurries, high winds, and much colder conditions. High 26, low 14.
The remainder of the week looks sunny, seasonably cold, and dry: highs around freezing and lows in the low 20s.
The weekend looks cloudy and milder with highs in the upper 30s to near 40, and lows just below freezing.
The following week is looking a bit colder; I’m still looking at the 13th and 14th for something interesting...
Bunk is a star!!
Yes, Bunk was featured on NBC10 this morning in a segment called "Take This Job" in which Terry Ruggles goes to area businesses and learns about the job. Bunk attends doggy day care at Total Dog and a Little Cat in Adamstown, where Jon and Lori take great care of him. (I know: we are those people, as in, I can't believe those people who lavish so much attention on their dogs and pamper them like they're actual human beings. Never thought it would happen, but Bunk came along and changed all that...)
Anywho, Bunk is at the beginning of the video trying to climb up the gate (and barking), and he's pictured at about the 42-second mark milling around on the floor. ("Little Bunk"--so named because he has the same coloring as Bunk and the two are constantly palling around together at Total Dog--can be seen at Bunk's feet.) That's Bunk's tail at about the 10-second mark too.
Enjoy!
Monsoon's Complete Weather Update for Monday, 29 December 2008
Greetings to all during this fantastically lengthy holiday break!
We are having a fine holiday season and enjoying the fuzz-ball—aka BUNK—as he brings his sweetness and energy to our home. Bunk just turned 4 months old and is growing by leaps and bounds (and, is leaping and bounding all around the house). Below are two recent pictures of Bunk: in the first, he rapturously gnaws on the chew toy his Aunt Megan got him for Christmas; the second features Bunk in a recumbent pose on the hassock, looking just as cute as the day is long.
On to the weather, which has been screwy of late: a high of 67 at my house on Sunday, and the low on New Year’s Eve will be in the teens. I’m currently looking at three potential snow/ice events for the region: Friday 1/2, Tuesday 1/6, and Friday 1/9. See details below and stay tuned for updates...
The weather:
Weather narrative: Enjoy these next couple of days in the 40s, because it’s the last time we’ll see temperatures this high until about the third week of January. Very late Tuesday night a system will move through to our north, and it may clip us with some snow showers into Wednesday, but nothing really to worry about there. Watch out for high winds and powerful gusts on Wednesday. Friday’s system is a bit more intriguing, in terms of the amount of moisture and temperature levels. I’ll send an update later in the week as that comes into clearer focus, but it could evolve into an accumulating storm. The next issue looks to be Tuesday, with a potentially unpleasant mixture of snow and ice that could cause a disruption in our school schedule. The Friday after we return is looking snowy, too, but I’ll leave that speculation until we get closer to the event. At the very least, it looks like we’ll be very cold by then, so it doesn’t appear we’ll have to worry about mixed precipitation with that storm.
Beyond the forecast: Continued cold with a significant storm possible for mid-January...
The Official Monsoon Martin Winter 2008-09 Outlook
‘Sup,
Before I reveal my first annual Official Monsoon Martin Winter Outlook, I want to welcome a new member to the Martin family. His name is Bunk, he’s a three-month-old standard poodle, and he’s a bearish bundle of furry sweetness; the sound of his inquisitive paddling around the kitchen sounds like a five-year-old in footy pajamas skimming happily across the floor, and makes us very happy. Of course he cannot replace Sasha and Ruthie, whom we lost earlier this month and miss desperately. Thanks again to those of you who offered your kind condolences on their passing.
But Bunk can help fill the void left in our lives by the absence of our late companions, and recover some of the peculiar joy we derive from welcoming an animal into our home. I look forward to keeping you posted on his growth (he’s 25 pounds or so now; he’ll grow to at least 60 pounds) and shenanigans.
Now, for the Official Monsoon Martin Winter 2008-09 Outlook, which is based on my own study of forecast models and meteorological trends, with a generous helping of “gut feeling” thrown in. I’ve divided the winter weather season into seven periods beginning with the first half of December and ending halfway through March (roughly, meteorological winter). Each entry begins with normal temperature ranges, followed by temperature and snowfall predictions, along with accumulation totals and winter weather cancellations and delays for area schools.
Please note that my outlook applies to the region encompassing a roughly 20-mile radius round Adamstown, bounded by northern Berks County to the north; Pottstown and western Montgomery County to the east; Mt. Gretna and eastern Lebanon County to the west; and Paradise and central-southern Lancaster County to the south.
Speaking of the weather, I wanted to share my favorite recent weather-related quote. It was uttered by Danny McBride, who plays Cody, a mulleted pyrotechnics expert in the film Tropic Thunder, when he blows up a row of palm trees: “Mother Nature just pissed her pantsuit!” [A note about Tropic Thunder: I love the film, especially Robert Downey Jr.’s performance in it—he does his best work since his role as Ian in 1985’s Weird Science and as Derek in 1986’s Back to School—but I realize it’s not for everyone. I found its gleeful disregard of propriety intoxicating and Downey’s “400 years” speech made me laugh as hard as anything I’ve ever seen in the movies.] McBride’s phrasing is something I plan to use liberally this winter in endeavoring to explain meteorological anomalies that may arise...
Where was I? Oh, yes. Kind of a lot going on lately. I’ve had a bit of trouble focusing. Back to the Official Monsoon Martin Winter 2008-09 Outlook. There are few really useful climatological clues this season—such as the presence of El Nino or La Niña, neither of which is present in the Pacific this year—so it’s especially difficult to make predictions with any accuracy (particularly regarding precipitation) until just days before the event. But I’m not in the business of equivocation or excuse-making here; I’m about rockin’ this outlook, and rockin’ it hard. Here goes...
First half of December: Average highs are typically in the low to mid 40s, lows in the upper 20s to low 30s.
December 1st to 15th will be colder than normal over all, with some nasty wind chills dipping into the teens. I’m fairly confident we’ll see a snow event in the 4-6” range somewhere around the 9th or 10th of the month; temperatures will become a bit milder then toward mid-month.
Winter weather cancellations and delays: Most of us have 10 school days in this period. I’m predicting 1 cancellation and 1 delay.
Second half of December: Average highs are typically in the upper 30s to low 40s, lows in the low to mid 20s.
December 16th to 31st will be average to a bit warmer than normal, and I do not believe we’ll see a “white Christmas” this year.
Winter weather cancellations and delays: Most of us have only 4 to 6 school days in this period. I’m predicting no winter weather-related cancellations or delays.
First half of January: Average highs are typically in the mid to upper 30s, lows in the low 20s.
After a relatively mild start, the bitter cold sets in by around the second week of January. I’m looking for a small to moderate event in the range of 4-6” early on.
Winter weather cancellations and delays: Most of us have 10 school days in this period. I’m predicting 1 cancellation and 2 delays, mainly due to icing problems.
Second half of January: Average highs are typically in the mid to upper 30s, lows in the low 20s.
Colder to begin the second half of the month, with a significant storm in the range of 10-12”, then a “thaw” with milder temperatures to end the month. Winter’s not over yet, though...
Winter weather cancellations and delays: Most of us have 9 school days in this period. I’m predicting 1 cancellation and no delays.
First half of February: Average highs are typically in the upper 30s to low 40s, lows in the low to mid 20s.
We’ll see very cold conditions and a one-two punch of winter weather events: a fairly moderate storm (6-8”) followed by a big snow (in the range of 12-15”) by mid-month, right around Valentine’s Day.
Winter weather cancellations and delays: Most of us have 9 school days in this period. I’m predicting 1 cancellation and 2 delays.
Second half of February: Average highs are typically in the low to mid 40s, lows in the low to mid 20s.
Around average, with a few days of milder “thaw” temperatures: winter’s chill begins to recede and the snow begins to melt, but a couple of freezing rain/sleet/snow events will make travel treacherous and disrupt schedules in the region.
Winter weather cancellations and delays: Most of us have 9 school days in this period. I’m predicting no cancellations and 2 delays.
First half of March (through the Ides): Average highs are typically in the mid to upper 40s, lows in the upper 20s to low 30s.
I’m looking for near-average temperatures with a few colder days mixed in. If these colder days coincide with a Nor’easter, we could see a major storm develop in the first or second week of the month; I don’t think the pattern is set up for this right now, though.
Winter weather cancellations and delays: Most of us have 10 school days in this period. I’m predicting no winter weather-related cancellations or delays.
Totals and summary: I’m predicting a very active (and frequently, quite cold) winter, especially when compared with the previous 3 or 4 winters, which featured a dearth of snowfall and milder temperatures than normal over all. Snowfall totals will be in the range of 36-42” generally, with fluctuations within the forecast region I outlined above.
Totting up the winter weather-related cancellations and delays: I think we’ll have 4 cancellations and 7 delays. Hell, we may even have an early dismissal or two, particularly in the active period from mid-January through mid-February.
Mother Nature will most definitely be shitting her wetsuit. Or was it sweating through her pantyhose? Puking in her soup? Ahh yes: pissing in her pantsuit. I’ll get it straight...